My sister, Kathy, became Mrs. Smith today. This morning we were all rushing around before the ceremony and Kathy, being a typical nervous bride, was stressing over every last detail. Were the place cards set out? Were they playing music for the guests? Were the favors for the guests at each place setting? Frankly, she was starting to stress me out with all the minute instructions, worries, and questions.
Hubby and I will celebrate our seventeenth wedding anniversary in about two months. It’s hard to fathom that we’ve been married that long because it has truly gone by in a blink. One thing that nearly seventeen years has taught us, though, is that while it’s pretty much second nature to get bunged up by little things, it’s not worth the energy. This is not to say that we don’t occasionally sweat the small stuff (because we do) but we’re much better about letting things go more quickly than we used to. Maybe it’s because we’ve figured out that in the end things usually seem to work themselves out, leaving behind a slightly more interesting story than we had planned on having. Maybe it’s because marriage has taught us that life is messy when multiple people are involved. Or, maybe it’s because seventeen years have passed and now we’re too old and tired to summon the energy to stress.
This morning, as Kathy was worrying about the fine details, I reminded her that the purpose of a wedding day is to end the day married. So, if at the end of the day she found herself married to Chris, then everything would be just as it should be. It doesn’t matter if the chocolate wedding favors melted in the 95 degree heat or if the sand ceremony was nearly thwarted by a broken glass container. Vows were spoken, rings were exchanged, and a husband and wife pronouncement was made. Kathy and Chris are married. I have a new brother-in-law, the kids have a new uncle, and Steve finally has another man in the family to help balance out the abundance of estrogen. It doesn’t have to be perfect to be good. The day went off with only one real hitch, and it was the one we all showed up for in the first place.